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When my husband and I were getting ready to welcome our third little bundle to our clan we knew we needed a game plan to help us survive. Three is a lot of babies you guys. One is a lot of babies. Babies are A LOT! So he came up with a motto. “Embrace the chaos” Simple as that. You either embrace it, or you drowned in it. So that’s just what we've been doing (embracing, not drowning) (most days) And you know what? It’s kind of been working. What exactly do I mean by this you ask? Take a trip with me. Down the toy aisles of Target. Are you familiar with this land? Something tells me you are. Often times this land is filled with the screams of tiny humans whose parents are telling them ‘no you may not have that $30 wubble bubble that pops after one hour of use and I know that because we have literally had three of them and they all popped after one hour of use so I think I know what I'm talking about.’ But tiny humans are not a rational breed of people. And sometimes they don’t take ‘no’ for an answer. And that's when the screams set in. And so in order to deal with what's going on you fall back onto your motto ‘embrace the chaos.’ Do NOT give in. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Stand firm. Calmly explain that the screaming is not going to end in a toy. In fact for every second you continue to scream you will lose 10 minutes of screen time. This is bound to piss the tiny human off even more. But that's OK. Really it is. You see, you have to parent like nobody's watching. Don’t let the fact that you're standing in the middle of a crowded store break your parenting spirit. Don’t give in because you're embarrassed. You're kids will scream. They will throw fits. They will force you to drag them across the floor to the check out. Because they are kids. And that’s what they do. And its OK! Are you being judged by other people? Maybe. Probably. But it doesn't matter. What matters is that you aren't giving in for all of the wrong reasons. And when you get home, and the fit subsides, and you didn't spend $10 on tiny rubber grocery items with eyes, you're going to feel really proud of yourself. And then sometimes you have to know when to just give in. Like when you venture out for the first time with two kids and you push your luck by hitting up two stores instead of just one. And everything is going great until you hit the checkout line and the baby decides he’s hungry. And at the exact same time the GD candy bars temp your daughter ( WHY WITH THE IMPULSE BUYS?!?!? WHHHYYY!? are you trying to kill me?) And then it’s almost your turn when you start to feel the pee leaking out of your son’s diaper down your stomach and onto your shoe. So you throw the candy bar into the cart, hand money to the cashier, and run out as fast as you can leaving a trail of urine behind you. And then laugh about it later with your husband and a glass of wine. Because it may not have been the ideal outing, but you survived. And that is awesome.
Embracing The Chaos: A Tale of Unwanted Parenting Advice

One of the worst parts of becoming a new parent is all of the unwanted parenting advice you get from...