The Pros and Cons to Having Kids Two Years Apart

The Pros and Cons to Having Kids Two Years Apart

The pros and cons to having kids two years apart // Lynzy & Co. Motherhood blog

“When are you having another” seems to be a fairly common question after you have the first baby. So many mamas are always asking, “What is the best age gap in between babies?” 

 The pros and cons to having kids two years apart // Lynzy & Co. Motherhood blog

Pros and Cons to having kids two years apart

The short answer to this common question is that there is no right or wrong answer. Rather that there are pros and cons to ever age gap in between siblings. I am writing this post now but I am sure I will write it again in a few years once I have a bit more experience under my belt πŸ˜‰ 

Liv is 2.5 years and Ellie is 6 months and they are exactly 2 years apart (separated by 2 weeks)

The pros and cons to having kids two years apart // Lynzy & Co. Motherhood blog

{This post was styled by one of our favorite kids shops for clothing,  Janie & Jack! Thanks guys!}

PROS

1.) Closeness in age // I love that they will be close in age and able to grow up in the same schools together. They are close enough to play the same games/sports/etc. I am a bit worried for when they are older and gang up on me, but I can worry about that later on….

2.) Your older child won’t remember life as an only child // Olivia adapted really well when Ellie arrived. It was a bumpy first week (when she first met her she said “Okay, you can put her back now”) but she soon started to love her more than anything. She wakes up every morning “Where’s Ellie”?! I can’t wait to put them in the same room! Our plan is for bunk beds. I truly believe that having to share a room with your sibling is one of the best things and allows them to learn how to share early on. 

3.) Embrace the effing craziness // If you wait too long, you forget about all the craziness that a baby brings into your life. If you stack them together, you never know what hit you! πŸ˜‰

The pros and cons to having kids two years apart // Lynzy & Co. Motherhood blog

4.) You can keep them both on somewhat of a schedule together – including sanity time (NAPS)! // I have successfully put both kids down for a nap in the afternoon around the same time. Granted, Ellie usually wakes up after 30 minutes but I STILL count this as a success, MMM’KAY?! 

5.) You don’t know any better // if you wait for a bigger age gap, you’re likely to enjoy things like

not having to change a diaper

sleeping through the night

nights away from home (it’s easier to bring them to grandparents, etc. once they are older)

etc.

Once you’re freedom is gone, you don’t miss it after awhile! (or at least that’s what I keep telling myself)

 

6.) The help you gain from others // This may happen with larger gaps as well but I can’t speak for those. BUT, I can’t tell you how many times I am struggling with the baby and trying to carry a toddler and people just flock to you to help. It’s like they know you’re about to lose your shizz and they come running to your rescue (little angels here on Earth).

 The pros and cons to having kids two years apart // Lynzy & Co. Motherhood blog

CONS

1.) Diapers x 2 // You are changing two babies instead of one (although Liv is slowly transitioning to going to the bathroom on her own) and this makes going out anywhere a bit of a challenge. You need to have both sets of diapers on hand at all times and figuring out how to change them both while out in public always poses a bit of a challenge. If only we have 5 sets of arms instead of 1…?

2.) “Helping” // Olivia LOVES to help, which is great in theory but in actuality it just means more for me to do πŸ™‚ Which I don’t mind at all since it makes her feel important and part of the party, but I can do without 25 wipes all over the floor and diapers undone and thrown behind the couches πŸ™‚ 

3.) Right back to number 3 of the “pros” // You are IN IT. Yep, those sleepless nights, they are pretty much continuous for YEARS. But hey, you’ll miss it when they are moving out of your house when they’re 18, RIGHHHHT?

4.) You’re either pregnant or a milking cow // Yep. There was 2 months in between the day I last nursed Olivia and the day I became pregnant with Ellie. I haven’t seen or heard from my own body since 2012. 

5.) Kiss your $$$ Buh Bye // Yep, this shit will cost you some serious dough. Just with the delivery of our second baby, our insurance coverage was the same but covered less and we had a hefty bill at the end. Just think about enrolling them in dance, school, daycare, etc. Prepare to watch your money fall out of your pockets faster than ever before!

6.) People think you’re cray // BECAUSE YOU ARE.

How far apart are your kids? Pros and cons?

Other great resources for moms:

GENERAL // Things I Wish I Knew Before Our Baby Arrived (Written by over 50 other mothers!) //  What to Bring a Mom after she has a Baby // New Mama Must-Haves // How to Transition from a Bottle to a Sippy Cup // Why you Should Hire a Birth Photographer // What I’ve Learned as a Mom Thus Far

BREASTFEEDING // Best Foods to Eat while Breastfeeding // Nursing Essentials // 10 Tips for those that Plan to Breastfeed // Nursing Essentials II // How to Increase your Milk Supply including a recipe for Lactation Cookies!

BABY REGISTRY GUIDES // Baby Registry List AND Free Printable Checklist  // The Ultimate Baby Registry Checklist // 

FOR AFTER BABY // A Letter to My Postpartum Body // 10 of the Best Online Kids Shops // 30 Going on 13: A Tale of Postpartum Puberty //

& don’t forget to join in on the #latenightnursingfeed!

23 Comments

  1. April 21, 2016 / 11:44 am

    All of these points are spot-on! I’m due with my second in June and my older boy will be 22 months at that time. I would add to the con list: your first-born isn’t your baby for long! I’m sad about not having time with just him any more once this baby comes!!

  2. April 21, 2016 / 3:36 pm

    Yep! This was exactly me. This is the first time since 2011 where I have not been pregnant or nursing. What will I do now? lol

  3. April 21, 2016 / 10:07 pm

    I have twins so I don’t know any different. It was soooo hard in the beginning but now at 5 it’s amazing. I wouldn’t change it for the world.

  4. April 24, 2016 / 11:47 am

    There’s just over three years between my two – there could have been less, only I had two miscarriages between them. I’d say be careful what you wish for as actually the three year age gap is perfect for us and I’m not sure I could have coped with less! #sundaystars

  5. April 24, 2016 / 3:13 pm

    Totally relate to this and agree with it all Aa my two are 22 months apart. It’s hard but so worth it to see their relationship grow. #sundaystars xx

  6. April 24, 2016 / 6:09 pm

    Nodding along with every single point. There’s 18 months between my two, and I am so happy about having such a small age gap. I was literally just thinking the other day that they will be at school together, they can look out for each other, with my little girlie only being in the next class up. (Is that right? Did I work that out right?)
    I totally agree with the combined schedules too! Same wake up time, same meal time, same bath time & bed time. It’s ideal. πŸ™‚

    Also, I just wanted to say about a con point. You wrote about having to buy twice the amount of diapers/nappies. I don’t find that to be a bad thing, (apart from the cost!) The little ones often need changing at the same time, and sorry if tmi, but they even poo at the same time! Weird! Haha.
    So it’s just a quick, ‘change one, done’, ‘change two, done’. Haha. I have a method. πŸ™‚

    I am definetly embracing the craziness, I love it. I love how close they are, and hopefully will always be.
    I’m very pleased I made the choice to have them so close together.

    I love this post. Thank you so much for sharing.
    (and so sorry about the extra long comment!)

    Sarah xx
    whimsicalmumblings.blogspot.co.uk – stop by and say hi! πŸ™‚

  7. April 26, 2016 / 4:15 pm

    There’s 16 months (exactly) between my two and I love it! The first couple of months were hard BUT now that they are three and two it is so worth it. Don’t get me wrong they have their moments but they just adore each other My eldest doesn’t remember a time pre his little sister and she just adores him so much – she is desperate to do all that he does.
    We have a third due in eight ish week and the age gap between the eldest and new baby will be 3 years and 8 months and 2 years 4 months between my daughter and the baby
    #toddlerapprovetuesday

  8. April 27, 2016 / 4:00 pm

    There are two years and 6 weeks between mine, and I have to say that I love how close they are (despite the squabbles!) but having two at nursery at the same time was a big cost!
    Thanks for linking up to #SundayStars

  9. April 28, 2016 / 12:09 am

    Love this list! I have two kids that are two and a half years apart. Luckily my daughter decided to be an over achiever and potty train on her 2nd birthday so I didn’t have to do the two in diapers thing, but the rest of this is right on!

    -Jaclyn

  10. April 28, 2016 / 7:43 am

    I love the pictures and the perspective. For us, two years was about right. We had two closer and two further apart — and so blessed to have all four!

  11. April 28, 2016 / 9:30 am

    I really liked hearing your side of things. I currently only have one child, hopefully another soon but they will be at least 5 years apart. Some things you listed I will never know, but the diaper break has been nice! πŸ™‚ There are absolutely pros and cons to both sides!

    Thank you for sharing with Everything Kids!!

  12. April 28, 2016 / 12:38 pm

    Life didn’t work out like this for us so our two are 4 years, 3 weeks apart. Looking back, there is absolutely no way I could have handled kids only 2 years apart. I would have lost my mind.

    That being said, I have definitely forgotten some of those newborn things and they are driving me crazy. The constant nursing is wearing me down. The up all the time in the night for the pure fact they lost their pacifier is actually making me a bit angry. Not to mention, 4 years may not seem like a lot but my body is 4 years older…and feeling every one of those 4 years. I wonder if God had followed my plans of having them closer together if it would have been better…or worse. I do love the fact my 4yr old is a pretty big help to me. #ShineBlogHop

  13. April 28, 2016 / 5:03 pm

    Hi Lynzy!

    I love your post and I love your blog. So lovely with lots of goody post to help mom’s like me get along in life. Thanks for putting this together. The kids look so stylish, too.

    I agree with everything you’ve shared. My last two are three years apart but are super close and have each other. All of their older siblings are 7 years older than they are! If they didn’t have each other I’d be a really busy Momma trying to entertain one lonely kid.

    I was your neighbor over at 100 Happy Days. Blessings to you and the family and have a great week! :o)

  14. April 29, 2016 / 3:01 pm

    haha I LOVE sanity time. There is 4 years between mine-not by choice but I am glad of that break now. If I got pregnant now, there would be a 2 year gap between 2 and 3. I think if you plan your pregnancies, and it works out, it’s great but life sometimes doesn’t allow for plans. #MaternityMondays

  15. April 30, 2016 / 8:19 pm

    Haha I loved all these pros and cons. I have daughters that are 2 year 9 months apart and daughters that are 20 months apart in age and I could relate to all these points. I love that you can find humor in the choas! Keep it up!

  16. April 30, 2016 / 10:01 pm

    This is lovely! I think there’s pros and cons of most age differences between siblings. It’s exciting to see their relationship blossom – regardless of the age difference.

    Thanks for sharing (and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop).

    Wishing you a lovely weekend.
    xoxo

  17. May 5, 2016 / 1:31 pm

    Lovely post. They are adorable. Thanks for sharing with us at the Inspiration Spotlight party. Pinned & shared. See you again soon.

  18. May 7, 2016 / 9:12 am

    Ha! So enjoyed reading this post! My three are all two years apart…all have August birthdays. Mine are tween/teens now, and I have to admit that I don’t remember a lot about when they were little! I stayed sleep deprived! Thank God for pictures. Thanks for writing this.

  19. Liese
    May 8, 2016 / 3:25 pm

    All so true!! Our eldest and middle sons are only 1year and 2 months apart, and between our middle and youngest son are 2years and 2 months, yes you read it correctly, we have 3 sons in a little more than 3 years, and i really like it this way. Ok, it’s a bit bussy sometimes, but also then can really play well together. Now they are 6, 5 and almost 3. During the day they are diaper-free, which is indeed easier, then when you have to carry around diapers, wipes, clothes,… When the 2 eldest where baby i put them into nappy time together, and i worker really well, they slept together for 2 hours. and i could take a rest too. Also the 2 youngest had nappy time together, so i had time to play with the eldest. Now still they go to sleep mostly at the same time in the evening. I wouldn’t change it for anything else!!

  20. Abbey
    May 19, 2016 / 5:30 pm

    Great points and all so relatable! Having 4 kids, all with varying age gaps, I find there’s a great deal of other factors that play a good role in how life looks.

    For us, we were suuuuuper young with our first. We waited for many reasons to add to our clan. When our second was born, I was 25 and at the more normal/socially acceptable/financially stable time of life to have children. Having a 7 year age gap was awesome and hard. We decided to dive head first into babies and have our last child close in age with the second so they could be besties and all that…uffda! What a bitch slap in the face that was. All the pros/cons listed are accurate accept one. There’s always the possibility your little cherubs DON’T love each other. Our boys, 22 months apart, couldn’t be more different. Now at the ages of 5 and 4, they are fiercely protective of each other (which really, at the end of the day, when all the fluff of life gets stripped away, is all a mother could want for her babes; them having each other’s back…because I can’t live forever.) and have good times but just aren’t best friends. I’ve had to make my peace with the realization that they may never be best pals and that my dream if our family dynamic was that: a dream. A hope. A prayer. Two years later, just as we potty trained the last of my wild boys, we found ourselves expecting a surprise fourth. Having a 3 year age gap has been mostly ideal in my experience. Other than the despair of restocking my diaper drawer weeks after kissing those Huggies goodbye and the psychological drain of a newborn scream/threenager shit-fit combo, I’d say it’s about perfect. I got lots of time with the youngest and he was pretty independent when the new baby came, but not so much that I had forgotten the labor of love that goes into super small humans. Now I’m officially in my 30’s and while we aren’t rich or building booming careers, we are comfortable and nestled into this season of children. I think age gaps aside its made all the difference! ????

  21. Brandy
    July 22, 2016 / 9:18 pm

    I have 7 kids all super close. I have 8 year old twins, a 7 year old, a 6 year old, a 5 year old and 3 year old twins.ost days are crazy and I don’t know how I am going to get through it. The help is no existent (besides hubby ). Even with all that said I wouldn’t have it any other way. All my kids are each other’s best friends and I love to see their friendship blossom more and more daily. With the exception of the youngest they andrea all in school together and play the same sports. I just think of the day when all of them will be leaving home one year after the other!!!

  22. Susie
    September 28, 2017 / 12:40 pm

    This is a great Article now i know what to expect… I just found out i am pregnant with my second baby. My first one is 1 yr and 1 month old and i am freaking out because handling one was not easy and now i’m just adding one more to the mix gives me anxiety… Nonetheless i am extremely happy for this little blessing but i cant help to be a little Skurred at what to expect.

  23. Alexa
    December 30, 2017 / 11:46 pm

    My girls will be just under 4 years apart when our second is born in about a month! I love that we had so much time with our first as an only child, and could give her so many experiences. She’s also (finally) potty trained, so we’ll only have the new baby in diapers!

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