To all the Mothers Mourning a Closed Chapter

I knew that I wanted to be a mother since a very early age. I dreamt about the days where I would hold and nurse my newborn, experience my toddler’s first sentences, watch them dream in my arms and run into their first day at preschool. Many of these doors have opened and closed with my first baby. I shed many tears each time a door shut behind me ad quickly reminded that time can certainly be a beast and it’s moving faster than we think. I looked forward to when my second would be born and I could soak into those newborn snuggles and watch her drift into a deep sleep in the quietness of the night. Before I knew it, it was time to wean her too and here she is screaming “Me too” when she wants something and “Peaseeee!!!” to make sure she gets it faster. 

Maternity Photography in a beautiful lace maternity dress // Maternity style with Lynzy & Co. and photography by Rowanberry Lavender

(Photography by a beautiful soul, Rachel of Rowanberry Lavender)

I’ve had so many fleeting thoughts throughout this pregnancy. Our third baby and I have no idea if this will be our last. Maybe deep down I know that it might be, and this is so difficult for me to comprehend. I can’t leave these days of pregnancy behind, no matter how difficult they may be. Some days I think that there is no way I could possibly make it 9 more weeks and there are others where I want to stretch it out until the end of time….never wanting it to end. Seeing what our bodies are capable of and watching my body go through so many beautiful movements to make another life has been incredibly eye opening for me. Life truly is a gift and it’s so damn beautiful that it’s hard to grasp at times….

One thought that has always kept me afloat when I wanted to cry about fleeting moments is 

Soak the moments of motherhood into the forefront of your mind, keep them there forever and be joyous about the memories to come. Our children are constantly demonstrating that life passes us by too quickly but the moments we leave behind are just as beautiful as the moments to come. Just because one chapter closes, doesn’t mean that there aren’t even more wonderful ones up ahead. I have learned that the moments where I fall apart, can be beautiful and that mourning my baby as a newborn, weaning from breastfeeding, bringing my baby to her first day of school are moments that are all a beautiful part of motherhood. Our tiny beings that are very much a huge part of who we are, are teaching us to be impassioned and soulful. 

So mama….

…do not mourn the closing of this chapter, whatever it may be; for there are many more beautiful moments and chapters to come within your journey of motherhood. 

<3

7 Comments

  1. June 5, 2017 / 12:02 pm

    Beautiful! Such a fabulous motherhood post.

  2. Holly
    June 5, 2017 / 3:49 pm

    Wow thank you for these words, I am really needing this right now, feeling all those feels too.

  3. June 5, 2017 / 4:16 pm

    Thank you so much for your positive and beautiful thoughts about motherhood. I love to see things like this in a culture that can be so hostile to children and childbearing. You have sacrificed a lot to be a mother, but it’s nothing compared to the blessings you’ll receive.

  4. Elm
    June 5, 2017 / 10:53 pm

    Beautiful!! I remember those days..days I never wanted to end..days that went by so fast..I loved those days I loved those baby years. My baby is 12 and God blessed us with nine pregnancy and eight healthy children. When my baby was three our first grandson was born so I kept enjoying those baby days. Now we are expecting our seventh grandson..this next chapter is amazing. We are so blessed!!!
    You are so beautiful and amazing. Enjoy every minute!!
    Praying the Lord blesses you with an easy delivery and healthy babe!!

  5. June 6, 2017 / 1:08 pm

    Andddddd I’m crying! I’ve been having serious baby fever now that our first is almost two. I miss her being a baby but it’s so amazing watching her develop into this smart and beautiful little girl. Beautiful post!

  6. June 13, 2017 / 12:47 pm

    Thank you for this, Lynzy! My son just turned one, and stopped breastfeeding a few weeks before that. It’s all bittersweet, because I enjoy watching him grow, change, and learn, but at the same time, I just want him to be my tiny newborn baby forever. He’s my first baby, though, and Lord willing, he won’t be my last. So the hope of more newborn smells and snuggles keeps me going when I feel like time is escaping me.
    I’m also learning to appreciate everything about my son, even the difficult things like teething and sleepless nights. It’ll all be gone before I know it, and he’ll be a grown man with his own baby one day. So I really am trying to cherish every big and little thing.
    Praying for you and your family as you welcome a precious new little life soon!

  7. Nathali
    July 6, 2017 / 12:29 am

    Love the very end! I am expecting my first baby and I find myself excited while mourning the chapter of just my husband and I. Needed your words. Thank you! #hormones.

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